How to Talk Dirty to Him?
What do you do when your boyfriend tells you to start talking dirty to him? Dirty talking is obviously his thing, but it is certainly not your cup of tea, so how do you deal with this major difference in foreplay preference? Will you give it a try and feel silly afterwards? Or, back out of your make-out session and totally reject the idea?
If you feel uncomfortable about giving this whole dirty talk business a try, it is completely understandable. The idea of talking dirty before or during sex can be intimidating, even offensive to a lot of people – though it shouldn’t be.
Talking dirty is all about losing your inhibitions and having fun, which basically entails expressing your innermost thoughts and fantasies and complimenting your partner. If you want to please your guy, there are many online references that you can turn to for inspiration on how to talk dirty. You may find many how to talk dirty phrases that you can use even if you’re still a beginner.
However, dirty talking isn’t as simple as jumping straight into the bandwagon. You have to let yourself get into the groove first before you can let your tongue do the work. So, if you want to know how to talk dirty to your boyfriend without feeling ridiculous, take these seven steps one stride at a time and enjoy each moment.
Step 1: Revel in passion and pleasure.
If you want to talk dirty to a guy, you must lose yourself in the heat moment and let your sexual instincts take over. Don’t overthink or you’ll find yourself either tongue-tied or blabbing some technical terms (take note: vulva and genitals) that can easily put out the flame of passion in any game. In fact, the trick to talking dirty to a man is to not think at all. Just relax and go with the flow.
Step 2: Lower your voice to a seductive whisper.
One of the most effective ways to talk dirty is to speak in a hushed tone. A lowered volume gives your voice a deep, husky, raspy and sultry quality about it that is so titillating to the senses. Foreplay has never sounded so erotic when you are whispering compliments into your partner’s ear.
Step 3: Tell your partner how you want him to pleasure you.
If you think giving instructions can turn your partner off, then think again. In fact, describing how you want be touched is foreplay in itself.
“Put your mouth on my breasts.”
“I want you to kiss my neck.”
“Grab me here.”
“Please don’t stop.”
These instructions do not only help your partner touch you in the most intimate and pleasurable ways possible, but their sensual effects on a man will surely make him lust for you more. Giving commands can make you sound confident and in control, and confidence is indeed sexy.
Step 4: Compliment your guy.
It isn’t enough that you tell your partner how you want to be touched. Let him know that he’s on the right track by gushing about how great he is in bed. Dirty talking to him is one major way of letting him know how satisfied you are with his sexual performance and there are countless phrases that you can use to boost his confidence.
Here are some dirty talk examples that can certainly make any man feel like a pro in bed:
“You look so manly right now.”
“You just turn me on.”
“Ooh…that feels amazing.”
“I love how you look at me.”
“I love what you’re doing to me.”
“I love how you feel inside me.”
“You make me feel so wet.”
“You’re so big.”
“Oh, you taste so good.”
Let him know exactly how good, strong and, most especially, big he is. You may be surprised to know that a lot of men are actually insecure about the size of their manhood, so compliments like, “I love the way you fill me up” lets him know that you appreciate how huge and hard he is.
Step 5: Ask questions.
With sex, it takes two to tango. If your pleasure matters to you most, his sexual satisfaction is just as important; hence, don’t be afraid to ask questions. Make it part of your role play and use it to your advantage. Asking him what he wants will not make you look like a novice. Asking your man how he wishes to be touched will actually intensify the sexual tension.
“How would you like it if I kiss you down there?”
“Do you like it when I sit on your lap and do this?”
“Do you want me to suck harder?”
“Do you want me to kiss your neck?”
“Tell me what you want me to do to you.”
Step 6: Be descriptive.
When you dirty talk to a man, be descriptive. Getting down to the details can heighten the sexual excitement between the two of you. Instead of just saying, “you’re so good in bed”, you can say, “I love the way you caress my breasts” or “I will never forget your big hands all over my body”.
Rather than tell him how manly he is, say how impressed you are with his show of strength when he carried you into the bedroom. Telling him that you daydream about him at work or during a meeting will drive him mad with lust for you. Revealing what your fantasies are about him will be like letting him into a dark and long-kept secret.
The more graphic the description, the better.
Step 7: Let go of your inhibitions.
“I want you”. There are no sentences more provocative than these three words. Telling your man how much he turns you on and how much of an “impact” he has made on you last time is a major plus on his ego.
Definitely, this is not a time to be coy about your desires, so just let it all out in the throes of passion. Don’t hold back anymore and let the words pour out no matter how shocking it sounds to you afterwards.